That's what fatherhood is about. That's all any of us dads want to be.
One day I realised I wasn't being a great dad. I wasn't even close. It was one grey winter's day in 2014. I was rushing my 3 and 5 year old sons out the house to nursery and school. I was working as a consultant and had a big work meeting that morning, and a train that couldn't be missed. The kids were taking ages, as kids do.
I got angry.
Bellowed at them. Manhandled them into their coats and shoes, picking them up and plonking them down outside. They zoomed off happily on their scooters, I was seething.
Then I caught myself.
I was an angry dad. A dad I never, ever wanted to be. In that moment I promised myself and them I'd be better. I'd be the best dad I could be.
But what does it mean to be a great dad? And how do I become a calm, patient parent, not a parent with anger issues.
That's what Being Dads is finding out. Of course there's no universal truth, but there are threads we can follow, ideas we can put into practice and practices we can repeat, getting better each time.
It's been a great journey so far. I've spoken to some incredible men. I’ve done a lot of self-experimentation on patience and calm parenting, what worked I’ve taught to others and they’ve found it helpful. I’ve done A LOT of research into child development, psychology, physiology, neuroscience and behavioural science to work out how to be a more patient parent. Through all this, I’ve become an Associate at the Fatherhood Institute, run workshops for big City firms on fatherhood with Parent & Professional in the UK, Cleo in the US and write for CircleIn, The Good Men Project and more.
And, I’ve become a calmer, more patient parent too. If you want to be involved, or have any comments, please get in touch - david@beingdads.com.